Jul 3, 2013

Phases



It is funny how a pendulum swings and how as time goes by different aspects of our personalities will come to the fore.  I have always been pretty much an introvert though for the past few years I have been more outgoing then normal.  Even though I am lucky enough to telecommute to work, I have been involved with quite a few things that would get me out of the house.  And I have made lots of online friends that I keep in touch with through email and Facebook.

Lately however I find myself drawing back.  I do hit Facebook but I tend to be much quieter when I am around.  I find myself considering stepping down as Chairperson for a local pagan group that I have been involved with for over ten years.  Heck I have even been quieter here on my blog then normal. 

I know that some of it has to do with my health.  I have fibro but have never had to deal with the chronic fatigue part of that syndrome until lately.  And of course, it hits as my husband's health is getting to the point where he doesn't trust himself to drive.  So now I find myself doing a lot of running about on my days off.   I find that I just don't have as much time as I am used too between the errands and being physically exhausted all of the time. 

So I guess that I have some decisions to make.  Do I keep pushing myself and hope that I get my energy back or do I withdraw into myself?  The only thing that I know right now is that I need to wait on any decision until I find out what is going on with my body.   For all I know, I might be dealing with a short term (hopefully) depression.  Time will tell.

Oh and I did pick up something wonderful for my readers yesterday.  I just need to get the energy to get some pics and put up the contest.


Enhanced by Zemanta

4 comments:

  1. I hope you are giving yourself permission to do "nothing" when that feels right, Shaiha. Just the bare minimum. I highly recommend it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. agree with Monique. Yes there things that 'must' get done, but it's okay to sometimes just slow down and do as little as necessary. I like to take at least one of my days off, if possible, and do absolutely frick all. Tomorrow 'should' be that day for me, but I have a house guest for the weekend, so after I drag my butt down to the lab to have some bloodwork done ( sans coffee >.< ) I'm treating myself to breakfast somewhere, then coming home to finish the kitchen deep cleaning I started over the weekend. the week end will be spent hanging out and having fun, but accomplishing nothing, so... I guess that will count as my frick all day ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Auto-immune changed me too, created new phases for me. I find the once a month trip to the doctor exhausting, and simply can no longer run errands, grocery shop, or travel. With your husband's health, that must be a challenge for you both. While my spouse will do my craft store shopping by phone (it has made us closer -- funny how beads do that) for the most part the help of our adult children and their beloved ones has been a gift. I hope a wonderful helper appears to you, nurturing energies, and that you are able to rest and meet your needs. It was intense for me to let go of all the caring I did with errands, taking people to work, etc -- but now, I am comfortable letting go and letting the universe work wonders. It happened slowly, but looking back now I see how much help I somehow now have!

    Much love to you,
    Rita

    ReplyDelete
  4. The more years I live, the more I find numbers of my friends and family negatively impacted by these and similar conditions. I seem to be most healthy out of all of us -- scary. I will add your cause to my prayers and workings, Sister, and will keep you and your family in them always. May we meet joyfully someday in this life, and until then, enjoy a pain-free and effortless time. Namaste, Sister. BB. )O(

    ReplyDelete

What's on your mind? Let's chat...